There is a wide spread of topics in this week’s lessons. Let’s start by looking at the purpose of the Nauvoo house and ministering.
A couple of recent experiences at church got me thinking about this topic. My wife and I were sitting in our little bench by the back door of the chapel when a new family came and sat in front of us. Normally that bench has a family that sits there religiously (forgive the pun). The parents of the family hadn’t arrived yet, so the bench was empty. Almost immediately their Deacon-aged son saw that someone was sitting where their family usually sits. He ran up the aisle and told the people that they were sitting in his family’s seat and they would have to move. As they began to stand up I said to the young man that it was bad form to ask anyone to move out of their seat just because you want to sit there. He countered that this bench just fit the size of his family. I told him that every bench on this side of the chapel was the exact same size, and that it isn’t very Christlike to treat someone in this way. The family moved anyway. I was mortified.
I mention this story because my wife and I have been treated this way multiple times in various congregations over the last few decades. We attended a ward once where, I swear, I could have danced on my pew and no one would have noticed us. We felt completely invisible. As we walked the halls after the sacrament meeting, no one even so much as glanced our direction. We finally gave up looking for a class to attend and left. Before any judgmental thoughts enter your mind, let me add that my wife uses a walker. Not only does that make us more noticeable than average, but it is also the case that she can’t be on her feet very long, so we couldn’t afford to wander very far looking for our class. We were really hoping someone would be welcoming and give us some directions.
I promise that I won’t bring up any more negative instances of Latter-day Saint behavior in some congregations. I know there are also many stories of wonderful interactions that save people’s lives, because someone is Christlike and embraces those who are new or who look or act different from the long standing members of that congregation.
The Lord wants me to welcome and accept others
I am including this section title only because this topic has strongly pressed itself upon my mind this week. I earnestly recommend you watch and rewatch the short video of Elder Ulisses Soares entitled A Friend to All. Elder Soares opens the video with this statement. “As good ministers that we should be, good disciples of Jesus Christ, we should understand and have empathy for every person.” Let’s talk about this idea for a second. In today’s society there is a worldly way of thinking that says if I am different and you don’t fully embrace my differences, and support them, no matter how bizarre they may be then you are at fault and need to change. That is not empathy. I don’t know what it is, besides unhealthy, but it isn’t empathy.
To be empathetic is to recognize and acknowledge how someone else is feeling. It is the act of recognizing that I have had that feeling, or perhaps something close to that feeling as well, so I know what it is like to experience what the other person is going through. A person demonstrating empathy recognizes the challenges the other person is facing and is respectful of their pain or suffering. In my first example at the top of this article, our Deacon-aged boy could have acknowledged that asking someone new to relocate causes a person to feel unwanted, unloved, and unimportant. It may even cause embarrassment or shame, in which case he would have immediately looked for another place for his own family members to sit. If he really understood how it feels to be new somewhere, he could have greeted the family and welcomed them to the meeting, expressing how pleased he was that they came that day. The amount of empathy we are able to exhibit is often based on our own emotional maturity.
I was surprised to find that empathy is a relatively new word in the English language. It has only been around for a little more than a century. What description was used in its place before the word was coined is a mystery to me.
Nauvoo House
Back to the Nauvoo house. The Lord didn’t just want a place built for Joseph Smith’s family to live in. Nor did He just want some place for visitors to rest. The Lord’s desire was to have someplace beautiful and appropriate so that those visiting the Saints for the first time would leave with a good impression of them as a people, because of their stay in the Nauvoo House. And as it turned out, there were a number of visitors who stayed in the Nauvoo House who spread their good impression of the Saints through the media of the day and began to build up the reputation of the church so many others had spent so much time and effort to destroy.
Here is the Lord’s first description of the Nauvoo House (Doctrine and Covenants 124:23-24).
23 And it shall be for a house for boarding, a house that strangers may come from afar to lodge therein; therefore let it be a good house, worthy of all acceptation, that the weary may find health and safety while he shall contemplate the word of the Lord; and the I have appointed for Zion.
24 This house shall be a healthful habitation if it be built unto my name, and if the governor which shall be appointed unto it shall not suffer any pollution to come upon it. It shall be holy, or the Lord your God will not therein.
Note that the Lord referred to the Nauvoo House as “the cornerstone I have appointed for Zion.” Again in verse 60 the Lord says this.
60 And let the name of that house be called House; and let it be a delightful habitation for man, and a resting-place for the weary traveler, that he may contemplate the glory of Zion, and the glory of this, the cornerstone thereof;
This building was no ordinary inn. Here is the first half of verse 56.
56 And now I say unto you, as pertaining to my boarding which I have commanded you to build for the boarding of strangers, let it be built unto my name, and let my name be named upon it, … (emphasis added)
I haven’t been able to find out if they actually put the Lord’s name on the house, like they do on the temples, but this designation is unique to the Nauvoo House during this period. I know of no other structure (outside of the temples) to be built in the latter-days where the Lord gave strict instructions to guard it from those who might bring pollution to His house. When God gave the instructions for the three buildings in the center of Zion in Missouri, He designated them as needing to be holy, but after they were driven out of Jackson County, Missouri I believe this is the only other non-temple structure to be set apart as holy to the Lord.
In this same spirit of inviting all to come to Christ, every chapel the Church builds has this sign out front to let people know they are wanted. It is up to us to help them feel wanted once they cross the threshold.
Cornerstone
A cornerstone is important for more than one reason. It not only helps to bear the weight of the building above it, but it is from this point that all other foundational supports are measured and built. The cornerstone is the key to the wholeness of the entire structure. In this week’s lessons the Nauvoo House, being the cornerstone for all of Zion represents the attitude of a Zion people. Look back at the verses I’ve already included and note to yourself all the attributes of Christlike ministering talked about in regards to the Nauvoo House. The House is to be good, “worthy of all acceptation,” healthy, safe, restful, a place for contemplation, and holy.
What are the attitudes we are supposed to exhibit as those representing Christ to the world in the latter-days? We are supposed to be welcoming and accepting of others. Our attitudes should be demonstrations of Christlike virtues of love, kindness, and patience. These are key virtues that enable someone steeped in the traditions of the world to contemplate the ways of God and His doctrines. As you watch the video I linked above, isn’t this what Elder Soares is describing about how these other branch-member families embraced his family, even though they had all these worldly habits that needed to be tolerated?
Accepting others where they are, without embracing their sins or habits is what Christ does for us. He loves us where we are, and over time the Spirit teaches us to change what God knows we can and should do without, and to include what we need in our lives. This is why we don’t demonstrate judgment when someone comes to church in clothing that is different from our current sensibilities, or talks in ways that may be foreign or uncomfortable to us. For many people it takes time, love, and exposure to come to the realization that they want to wear something else for church other than the sweatshirt and blue jeans they wore when they first attended. What they wear to church doesn’t make them any more or less loved by God. Those judgments are from us, and they are based on the world’s standards of division, not the Lord’s standard of inclusion.
My wife has a personal mission story from when she was serving in the Beverly Hills/Belair ward area near Los Angeles, California. There was a woman, an entertainer by profession, who got baptized. Shortly after her baptism she was asked if she would like to sing in sacrament meeting. Sure enough, the next Sunday she and her band showed up to perform a modern rock number. She was decked out in her best performing outfit, a sequined miniskirt. To the credit of the ward not a word was said to embarrass the new convert. They were kind and gentle, treating her performance like she had just performed Amazing Grace, because they understood that she was new to the gospel culture, although she probably wondered why no one clapped. This is what Elder Soares is talking about when he talks about acceptance and love. The Spirit takes as much time to educate each of us in the ways of the gospel life as we need to take. We need to give each person the time they need to make whatever changes need to be made, without trying to force shortcuts in the process. God doesn’t take shortcuts with us, so why should we try to take shortcuts with each other?
Respect
Elder Soares makes the point that Latter-day Saints should respect the way other people were raised and have patience with them. God deliberately put each of us here on earth into different circumstances. We were all raised with different ways of thinking and acting. The Lord doesn’t fault us for the situation He put us into when we entered mortality, and we shouldn’t fault our neighbor because they don’t think and act like we do. It is our responsibility to act like the Savior and embrace others and love them where they are in life. I always told my children that no matter what they experienced out in the world, our home was a safe place where mean behavior was not tolerated. No one should ever come to church and feel like someone was mean to them. The world is not a safe place, but the Lord’s kingdom should be.
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